Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Randomize
