Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Randomize