Texts From Last Night

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  (404): View more from Georgia

  In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.

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  (404): In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson. http://tfl.nu/jbmm
  Replies (6) Good night (703) Bad night (1705) Order T-Shirt
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  I hope mine doesn't look like that

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  (250): I hope mine doesn't look like that http://tfl.nu/sndl
  Replies (2) Good night (506) Bad night (2129) Order T-Shirt
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study

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  (780): White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study http://tfl.nu/oth0
  Replies (28) Good night (3155) Bad night (640) Order T-Shirt
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.

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  (517): I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen. http://tfl.nu/y9v8
  Replies (13) Good night (5717) Bad night (1109) Order T-Shirt
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  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.

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  (865): I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is. http://tfl.nu/unb6
  Replies (13) Good night (4732) Bad night (1182)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories

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  (973): my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories http://tfl.nu/tcvk
  Replies (7) Good night (2831) Bad night (1662) Order T-Shirt
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  (210): View more from Texas

  Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....

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  (210): Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later..... http://tfl.nu/qwdm
  Replies (1) Good night (5048) Bad night (976) Order T-Shirt
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  (619): View more from California

  Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.

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  (619): Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating. http://tfl.nu/bhg3
  Replies (10) Good night (1086) Bad night (2708) Order T-Shirt
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.

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  (828): Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me. http://tfl.nu/wdvy
  Replies (15) Good night (7914) Bad night (879) Order T-Shirt
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?

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  (417): Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off? http://tfl.nu/54ro
  Replies (4) Good night (545) Bad night (1676) Order T-Shirt
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too

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  (623): Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too http://tfl.nu/3dvb
  Replies (20) Good night (1511) Bad night (493) Order T-Shirt
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?

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  (860): I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that? http://tfl.nu/7o3y
  Replies (10) Good night (1324) Bad night (337) Order T-Shirt
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms

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  (781): Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms http://tfl.nu/wx24
  Replies (10) Good night (1103) Bad night (632) Order T-Shirt
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  (+64): View more from New Zealand

  Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.

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  (+64): Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed. http://tfl.nu/dscf
  Replies (0) Good night (424) Bad night (131) Order T-Shirt
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  (707): View more from California

  My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?

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  (707): My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day? http://tfl.nu/zsu8
  Replies (7) Good night (224) Bad night (697)

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