i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
These 17 Delivery Dudes Suck At Their Jobs But Are Winning At Life
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.