Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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