So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
