We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
