So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
