Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
