apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
Randomize
