I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
