Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
i don't know whats more disturbing, that his dog drooled directly into my mouth or that i was too drunk and tired to do anything except let it be there.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
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