RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
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