I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize