nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
