just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted