I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
masturbating while the coffee brews is the new power nap
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life