I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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