No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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