dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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