oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
