Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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