She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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