This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Randomize
