Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
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