hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize