Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
