come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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