Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
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