im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
