My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
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