Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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