I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
