Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.