I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
the room spins SO much faster in panama
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
