Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
