i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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