Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize