You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
Randomize
