I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize