No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
