So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
