The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize