I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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