just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
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