Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
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