Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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