I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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