You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize