based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
