Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
