can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize